DISCUSSION QUESTION: Think about this past week. Did God use someone in your life to help you grow spiritually? Were you able to help someone else grow spiritually?
This week, I to consider one of Christ's teachings: whoever desires greatness must become a servant. What I claim to believe and know about Jesus is only meaningful when I apply it in service. Because Jesus is my master, I must serve others. What will it take to build a great relationship?
What we know, what we believe, and what we say we believe do not make successful relationships. What makes words powerful is the action that flows from them. What makes correct theology powerful and meaningful is the life that emerges from that knowledge. We have talked a lot about thinking the correct way about our relationships. But that understanding is on display not in our words or our thinking but in how we treat others!
DISCUSSION QUESTION: The Bible has many passages on what we should be doing for "one another" (often called the one-another passages). How many one another commands can you name?
Let's look at Mark 10:35-45:
And James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came up to him and said to him, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” And he said to them, “What do you want me to do for you?” And they said to him, “Grant us to sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your glory.” Jesus said to them, “You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I drink, or to be baptized with the baptism with which I am baptized?” And they said to him, “We are able.” And Jesus said to them, “The cup that I drink you will drink, and with the baptism with which I am baptized, you will be baptized, but to sit at my right hand or at my left is not mine to grant, but it is for those for whom it has been prepared.” And when the ten heard it, they began to be indignant at James and John. And Jesus called them to him and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What led to conflict among the disciples?
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What truth does Jesus teach them?
How many of our relationships revolve around sharing our concerns and meeting our needs? I am married with two children. Often I am committed to thinking about how they can make my life more fulfilling. I know this is true because it irritates me to give up personal comfort to serve them. These are the people I love most in the world; I haven't even started thinking about difficult people. Do you see this in yourself? This is the first step to becoming a servant and building great relationships. We must see how much of a servant we aren't before we can change.
The disciples had to learn this, which means we have a chance. Twelve normal men spent several years with Jesus. But they were still competing for power and position. It was a lesson Jesus felt was important enough to stress even as he prepared for his death. John records for us in John 13:1-17 how Jesus intends for us to follow him. Jesus gives his disciples instructions that will help them change the world.
Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. During supper, when the devil had already put it into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, to betray him, Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going back to God, rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples' feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, do you wash my feet?” Jesus answered him, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.” Peter said to him, “You shall never wash my feet.” Jesus answered him, “If I do not wash you, you have no share with me.” Simon Peter said to him, “Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!” Jesus said to him, “The one who has bathed does not need to wash, except for his feet, but is completely clean. And you are clean, but not every one of you.” For he knew who was to betray him; that was why he said, “Not all of you are clean.”
When he had washed their feet and put on his outer garments and resumed his place, he said to them, “Do you understand what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord, and you are right, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you. Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.
DISCUSSION QUESTION: From this passage what do we learn about what it means to be a leader and Christ's disciple? (We are required to serve others; when we choose not to serve others but ourselves instead, we place ourselves above Christ - a servant is not above his master.)
Circumstances do not determine whether we serve. One of our most common excuses for not being more loving and helpful is our circumstances. When we are weighed down with problems, what is the first thing we want to do? We don't want to do anything! We want others to do things for us. We want to be served, not serve. Again, I only have to look as far back as this past week for examples from my own life. When I was sick earlier in the week, I was frustrated when it wasn't clear to everyone that I needed space, that I needed rest, that I needed things done for me. Then when I realized I was being unreasonable and impatient, I tried to rationalize it by pointing out to myself that I felt bad, so I was bound to react incorrectly when put under pressure. In other words, if my circumstances were easier, I would be a better servant. If I could take care of my cares, I would be more caring. In fact, I had more problems related to my sickness while I was studying for this, and it tempted me to pity myself all over again!
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What are Jesus' circumstances in John 13? (Jesus knows the hour had come for him to die on the cross for self-centered sinners. He knows the wrath of a just and holy God will soon fall on him. He knows a friend will betray him.)
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What does Jesus do? (He serves his disciples. He does for his disciples what they should have done for him.)
It would have been tempting for Jesus to say, "Don't you understand what's about to happen to me? Get a grip and comfort me!" Yet he says nothing about what is about to occur; he just serves without self-pity. This kind of service is not normal - it is miraculous. When our circumstances are difficult, it feels like a miraculous act to serve someone else. But this is what Jesus did, and he calls his followers to do the same. We should never minimize someone's humble service; it is a sign of God's grace at work in a person's life.
Someone's worthiness does not determine whether we serve. Jesus not only serves during his great crisis; he serves the ones who don't deserve service. As Jesus' eyes scanned the room, I wonder what he was thinking. As he washed Judas' feet, the same feet that would carry Judas to the high priest and then to the garden to betray him. He sees Peter, who would soon deny that he was ever associated with Jesus. The other ten disciples would use the feet he is washing to run for cover when he needed them. And yet Jesus gets down on his knees and serves them all.
Think of all the areas of worthiness we consider. Will they appreciate what we have done? Will they betray us or take advantage of us? Will they expect more? Have they done anything for us in the past or hurt us in the past? We consider their sin and their selfishness, or we consider how critical they might be. All these considerations mean we are concerned with how worthy we feel the other person is. But Jesus calls us to serve even when we risk being vulnerable, unappreciated, irritated, and unrecognized. Even when it means serving the selfish and weak. Who tempts us to give up? Who in our lives has maxed out their compassion quotas? Jesus is calling us to serve those people. Think about the one or two people who have significantly changed your life for good. Weren't humility and servanthood a large part of their influence?
Our position does not determine whether we serve. Jesus is God. Creator and King of the universe. Yet he chose to serve and to humble himself by washing his disciples' feet.
DISCUSSION QUESTION: How is Jesus' example and definition of greatness very different from the examples and definitions the world gives us?
I can't think of any relationship where this idea is more put to the test than with my family. The Bible gives me authority. I am the head of my household. Shouldn't my family serve me? The Bible commands me to use my authority to serve Paulette, Seth, and Sean and seek their benefit. I am a servant, not a king.
DISCUSSION QUESTION: Where in your life do you have the privilege to serve those who are "under" you?
We saw earlier that serving in the midst of difficult circumstances, serving and overcoming our own self-centered nature, and serving those who are unworthy requires a miracle. It is a miracle God desires to perform in each one of us.
The first part of the miracle happened when Jesus went to the cross on our behalf to wash us and forgive our sins so that the Holy Spirit could live in us. This is what Jesus meant when he said to Peter, "Unless I wash you, you have no part with me." Accepting God's grace in his gift of salvation is the first step to being able to show grace and to serve others.
The second part of the miracle is that by the Spirit we have to power to show grace and to serve others. This requires daily cleansing from God. It is what Jesus meant when he said to Peter, "A person who has had a bath only needs to wash his feet." Christ's death on the cross cleaned and justified us. But we still need daily cleansing and sanctification. We can't live only on past grace; we need present grace.
The moment we move out into the world we face trouble and temptation. We may become involved in conflict and persecution. There will be times when we want to quit and wonder if it is worth following Jesus. At these moments, we need the work of the Spirit to remind us of our own sin and remind us of the grace available to us. The service Jesus rendered for us in his life, death, and resurrection is not only for forgiveness of sins or for a future in heaven. It is also for the daily power to change in the present. We are not only promised life after death but also life before death!
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What tends to keep you from serving others?
DISCUSSION QUESTION: What are some new opportunities for us to serve in our school and church?
- Whoever wants to be great must become a servant.
- Jesus is our model for perfect servanthood.
- Serving others is never optional if I claim Jesus as my Lord.
- I need to be reminded of my need for grace and forgiveness so I can offer grace and forgiveness to others.
- I need to be mindful of how Christ served me so I can serve others.
- I need to see myself as a servant in relation to others.
- I can serve others by loving, accepting, honoring, carrying their burdens, and bearing with them.
- I must look for opportunities to serve instead of looking for excuses not to serve.